Blair pours water over Brown at the Labour Party conference!

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All articles on this blog are untrue and fabricated. Any similarity to persons, dead or alive, is totally fluky or is intended simply as a satire, parody or spoof.

The Lone Voice: Gordon Brown - Downfall.

The Lone Voice: Gordon Brown - Downfall.


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All articles on this blog are untrue and fabricated. Any similarity to persons, dead or alive, is totally fluky or is intended simply as a satire, parody or spoof.

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Northern Rock to Sponsor the London Olympics

Londoners jump for joy as pressure on their council tax is lightened with today's announcement from reinstated CEO Adam Applegarth.

Applegarth stated that the company needed to re-establish its identification and best way was to invest shareholders money in the biggest lost leader it can find. It is thought the donation could be as much as £100 million with the new loan from the Bank of England.

Boris Johnson was unavailable for comment but his newly appointed spokespersons made some comments.

Edwina Currie said, "Most of the egg production in this country, sadly, is now affected with salmonella."

Lembit Opik added, "I think it is unjust for people to discriminate against rocks, north or south they are all the same."

Allah Sugar couldn't Adam and Eve it but said "any money is good money."

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All articles on this blog are untrue and fabricated. Any similarity to persons, dead or alive, is totally fluky or is intended simply as a satire, parody or spoof.

Police raid kitchen shop and seize hundreds of knifes

Police today raided silversmiths, cutlers, flatware and kitchen ware shops through out the capitol and were surprised by the number of knifes found on the premises.

Deputy, stand in, might get promoted assistant patrolman Jones said "It was surprising the types of knifes we found, some were designed for cutting meat" he went on to say that commercial kitchens were the next target as there had been reports of some particularly big knifes seen.

Jacqui Smith made a short statement "We are weak on crime and even weaker on the causes of crime" her statement went on to say all knifes will be withdrawn from use in England.

She also gave a hint on other measures they will be putting in place:

• Extending ID cards to all citizens over 5 years of age
  
• Curfews in inner city areas
  
• Issue of stab proof vests to all civil servants

Smithy dismissed opposition leaders requests for more police enforcement and bigger prisons as unrealistic as the country was nearly bankrupt.

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All articles on this blog are untrue and fabricated. Any similarity to persons, dead or alive, is totally fluky or is intended simply as a satire, parody or spoof.

Wendy Alexander is to challenge Gordon Brown for leadership of Labour Party

Trout pout Wendy who is thought to be a close friend to Gordon has revealed that she wants his job.

Wendy Alexander has also got a number of key Labour losers backing her.

Harriet Harman, Labour Deputy Leader said, "She is strong champion of Labour, and above all for women"

Des Browne (Gordon's cousin), Scottish Secretary remarked, "A woman of no talent and I have to say of the lowest integrity"

Nigel Griffiths, A Labour MP for Edinburgh declared, "She is one of the outstanding political thinkers of her generation. I thought she showed really good leadership. Her speeches and her ideas have helped destroy policy"

Wendy is like a whirlwind getting from one meeting to the next and she can talk just as fast as she can run. Wendy knows all about balancing work and failing to register donations and it certainly shows.

Ms Alexander's minders issued a lengthy statement, the first part referrers to her challenge for the leadership of the English Labour Party.

The second part refers to her vision which focussed on four main themes:

• A competitive yet compassionate donations policy;
• People focused public services;
• Empowering institutions and not people and communities;
• Scottish solutions for English aspirations.

Ms Alexander added before departing, "Hiking Income Tax for every working man and women and then passing the proceeds on to local MP's, will be good news for democracy"

Gordon Brown was unavailable for comment.


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All articles on this blog are untrue and fabricated. Any similarity to persons, dead or alive, is totally fluky or is intended simply as a satire, parody or spoof.