Go Nude to Toughen Up

Go Nude to Toughen Up.

Ministers in DEFRA have supported Jake Ulrichs comments on adapting to climate change and rising costs of energy, although they have added more detail.

MP’s Hillary (Big) Benn and Joan (Razor) Ruddock made a joint statement at Sussex University.

“The working classes of Great Britain have been pampered over the past century and have become soft and cannot cope with a few hardships anymore”

They went on to attack the middle class by accusing them of living in isolation from reality and using vast amounts of energy in the summer to keep cool with air conditioning and in the winter using more precious resources to keep warm.

Their advice, which is supported by Al Gore is simple, go nude. By going nude the body will start to acclimatise  and require less energy and clothing to heat or cool. The advice will be supported by a new Act of Parliament,

Friends of the Mud and the Naturism Society have welcomed the new initiative and will hold an official launch at the Mile High music festival where they will all strip.

The Mary Whitehouse appreciation society will be opposing the new Act and feminist groups have stated they will be keeping their clothes on.

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All articles on this blog are untrue and fabricated. Any similarity to persons, dead or alive, is totally fluky or is intended simply as a satire, parody or spoof.

Gordon Brown is given highest honour by the French

"I award Gordon Brown the Legion of Honor, the premier order of my country," Nicolas Sarkozy, president of the French Republic said, noting that the medal was established in 1802 by Napoleon Bonaparte for services to the French people.

He also noted that for over 200 years the French had been trying to bring England to its knees, but Gordon has done it in a relatively short space of time as Chancellor and as the Prime Minister.


Vive le Gordon cried Charles de Gaulle Jnr, my father would have loved to see this.

Tony Blair was also recommended for this award but rejected the offer. He said "Its president of Europe or nothing" Cherry is fuming according to Danny le Rue and has threatened to write another comic if Tony does not take the medal - after all Gordon has one.

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All articles on this blog are untrue and fabricated. Any similarity to persons, dead or alive, is totally fluky or is intended simply as a satire, parody or spoof.

Dolphins assassinated by French frogmen

Hommes-grenouilles of the Marine Nationale (French Navy) have killed at least 26 dolphins they thought were defence forces of the British Navy. The murderous act was done in preparation for the invasion of Cornwall and its tin mines.

A spokesman for the French Navy, Vice-amiral d'escadre, Henri Désiré Landru denied all the allegations and would not comment further until his lawyer was present.

The main material for making French cars is tin as it is (was) easily stolen from Cornwall. Industry insiders have said the French automobile makers, Citroen and Renault, are short of tin and are now taking desperate measures to replenish their stockpiles, but the new British defences have been making it difficult for them.



According to defence documents found on the Piccadilly line last night, the dolphins had been trained to defend the Cornish coast line as they were more expendable and cheaper than ships.

The MOD, RSPCA and Ruth Kelly are to make a joint statement later today

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All articles on this blog are untrue and fabricated. Any similarity to persons, dead or alive, is totally fluky or is intended simply as a satire, parody or spoof.